Well it finally happened, I had a northern Xmas and "BYGUM" it was glorious, I've even forgotten every southern word I used to use to describe things it's been that overwhelming.
So myself and YAK decided to book an Aparthotel, which is
a weird word, I always imagine I'd have to put the hotel together in order to stay there. We stayed at the Blue Rainbow Aparthotel in the much sought after area in central Manchester (http://www.bluerainbowaparthotels.com/).
Despite all the praise I have to give in a moment, you would think that the name like "blue rainbow" would be obvious, no! Someone at their design and marketing team said, let’s make it red, pink and sliver and not use a RAINBOW!! Seriously get these
people a CMYK chart and make them watch a program with Zippy, Bungle and George in it! IT'S SIMPLE!!
Anyway, the place is amazing, *NEW JOB EGO BRAGGING ALERT* with my new job, I got a good discount on this place for Xmas and ended up in the Executive
Apartment, my lord, I want to live here. It's well laid out, well equipped and clean, like you could eat off the toilet (please don't). It's very modern and chic, yes even the obligatory 1960's pop culture icon canvas was provided, and you get these in affluent
places when they know they've run out of design patterns, we got Audrey Hepburn!
It's in a good quiet location and despite it being in the centre but with Deansgate train & train station 2 mins away.
And before you enquire, yes I had
an amazing time, did you? Ummmm what? I can't hear you I'm too busy being affluent.
Since I can never end my entries without some random story, I'll give you two as it's a time of sharing and shaming.
1. I came back from a trip to Reading
with a nasty bug/flu and gave it to YAK unfortunately it involved "stomach unpleasantries" for us, the hotel decided to only give us ONE half used toilet roll. After a heavy Xmas dinner we RUN out of paper, as I'm a former scout I managed to scavange some
subway serviettes as a replacement. To make things worse I was halfway through “using” one serviette and found a black olive in it.....NEXT
2. A fight breaks out around 11pm on Christmas day in the adjacent apartment and I had to put my
hands in my head and go why? Yes that's right it was black people! and I now have to admit something which Gina Yashere and Wanda Sykes bring up and is right, when there's any type of disturbance, a black person will instantly think "is it a black person,
don’t shame us we are all together and dignified" and when they find out they then go into the groups "I had to identify them as "the other black". I had a look at the culprit, yes he was Jamaican, my Bajan heart can rest. Sorry it's true if a black
person shames themselves in front of anyone, you need to shift the blame to "the other blacks" (it's always Jamaican!!)
And as a bonus we have a third mini tale
3. My friend whose name I will protect again in case I get summoned to court, so
her codename is Gin! we treated her to a Margaret Cho stand up DVD viewing and let's just say I think gay right ranting and period jokes didn't win her over.... she's odd, I have to delete Gin, clearly! (if she's reading this, of course I won't, love you :)
Anyway Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and Happy New Year, don't do anything I wouldn't do.... that doesn't leave much you dirty bitch!